Let's Meet Ego's Evil Triplets.
Let's start with
Guilt - Your Inner Wolf
Howling an
ululating poem to the moon, a lone wolf is silhouetted against the night sky.
He turns, notices you watching and haughtily leaves to return to his pack. How
majestic! How powerful! Chills run down your spine as you observe the primal
drama. Oh, to be a wolf and to share in that majesty and power yourself.
Over eons wolves
have developed an unerring dynamic for survival called the pack. With the pack the wolf lives, and without it he
or she dies. That same instinct for successfully living in society is tied in a
strangle hold to our instinct to keep our bodies going. Within wolf or human, ego strives to perfect
living in a pack. So, many of the same survival tools for wolves have been
honed by human society as well. And those very same tactics that are richly
alluring in their romance and strength in the wolf are often addictive,
destructive and sinister in humans. Let’s look
at why something that works so perfectly in the animal kingdom falls flat on
its face for people.
Now, I am no
expert on wolves, I’ve simply watched those same nature shows you have on
TV. But, one thing stands out – to keep
the pack in working order misconduct is reprimanded quickly and fiercely. If
you don’t keep the rules you endanger the survival of the pack. Just watch your
pet dog. Once you establish yourself as alpha in his pack, your word is law. As
your pet scoffs up that left over piece of pizza on the coffee table, you raise
your voice slightly, and he stops, the ears go down and he droops off with a
distinctly guilty slouch.
Guilt is a
tool: Make the pack member feel guilty
and the miscreant usually stops. If that’s not enough, fierceness can turn to viciousness
and even a ripping out of the throat, a sure way of ending wrong actions,
permanently, and keeping the pack safe.
Guilt is a tool to
keep others in line. Now, this is really great in a wolf pack when long logical
discussions are severely limited. But,
humans have hopefully evolved to, rarely, if ever ripping out a youngster’s
throat for taking the car keys when he shouldn’t. Though sometimes a few family gatherings I have
observed in the past, thankfully not
mine, and seen from afar, can emotionally feel just like that.
However, guilt is still used as an extremely
potent tool for keeping people around you in line. You use it on them and they
on you. Some examples: Your mother calls, starts asking about your job, your
friends, why you don’t call more often, and suddenly you feel like you are five
years old again and you start to droop and want to creep away in a distinctly
guilty slouch. Or, your spouse comes in later than usual for dinner and you ask
with arched eyebrow, “So where have you been?” The atmosphere immediately turns
grim.
So, what does A Course in Miracles say about guilt and
its sidekicks fear and anger? Well, these emotions may occur, but holding onto
them for longer than a moment to recognize them is ‘unjustified’. What does
this mean? We are human, part of the animal branch on the tree of life and all
emotions will flow through us at one time or another. However,
when we hold onto guilt, fear and the resultant anger, replaying it again and
again in our minds, we are changing the original law of the pack into a human
dysfunction. Our ego has gained reinforcement that this is good, when in
fact it is slowly killing us.
There are deeper
and darker areas of guilt within us the ego keeps carefully locked away. When
unworthiness from childhood is reinforced by the world around us damage begins
to erode our subconscious leaving it tragically leprous. Ego began a massive
campaign to hide these feelings of guilt, fear and unexpressed anger in a
stupendously misguided campaign of coping mechanisms . For now, though, we need not label the myriad
array of neuroses and psychoses .
All we actually need
to do is recognize that guilt is neither good nor bad, after all. Guilt is
simply a red flag suggesting we may have done something incorrectly. All we need do next is assess if our actions need
to change. If they do, then suck it up and change. If we assess our actions as
O.K. then we can go about our business as usual. Not to worry. How to assess
correctly the one or the other will be reviewed in later sections.
The glory and
majesty of the pack seen on a distant snow encrusted hill is working just
perfectly. They know what they are doing. Guilt, fear and a short burst of
anger keeps the pack vibrant and functioning. Just remember, however, when we
feel ourselves wallowing in unworthiness and wanting to dump that extra dollop
of guilt and anger onto another, assess what we
are doing very carefully by asking for the insight and direction of the your
inner power. And when that glob of guilt smacks you in the face, shake it off,
change if you need to and move right along. That’s the sign of being human and
humanity becomes just as glorious and majestic as the primal wolf pack.
But for now, listen
carefully. If you do, you will hear the echo of human laughter and the
ululating song of the wolf echoing together. Their songs ring through the
valleys and across the distant mountains in a joyous serenade of love.
important
point
When
we hold onto guilt, anger and the resultant fear, replaying it again and again
in our minds, we are changing the original law of the pack into a human
dysfunction.
Thoughts,
Suggestions, Things to Practice
1. Notice
how and when others dump guilt on you.
2.
Notice how and when YOU dump guilt on
others.
3.
Now try to find the reason you all are
trying to control others with guilt.
Take heart, this is just the beginning of the correction process.
Next lesson we will cover 'FEAR' as we continue to study the ego's offspring. Discussion with friends can be great fun and hugely supportive when you study this course. Remember for indepth coverage of these concepts you can always review right from the source, "A Course in Miracles". You can also get a 'hard' copy of the whole mini course in book form here at
bettejeancundiff.blogspot.com.
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